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A bartender is just a

A day without sunshine is

A good day is when

A woman without a man

According to my calculations the

Alcohol and calculus don't mix.

All Men Are Animals, Some

All men are idiots....I married

All you need is a

Always remember you're unique, just

And on the th day,

Are you into casual sex,

Are you stoned or just

As long as there are

Ask me about microwaving cats

Atheism is a non-profit organization.

Auntie Em, Hate you; Hate

Avenge Yourself - Be a

Back up my hard drive?

Be nice to your kids.

Beauty is in the eye

Been There - Shit Happened

Beer - Helping ugly people

BEER: It's not just for

Body By Nautilus; Brain By

Boldly Going Nowhere

Buy American while there is

Change is inevitable, except from

Chicken Little was Right!

Clear the Road I AM

Cleverly Disguised As A Responsible

Computers help us to do

Consciousness: that annoying time between

Contraceptives should be used on

Could you drive any better

Cover me. I'm changing lanes.

Despite the cost of living,

Diplomacy is the art of

Discourage Inbreeding - Ban Country

Do you trust a government

Dogs think they're human. Cats

Dole for Pineapple.

Don't be stupid. We have

Don't Californicate Oregon.

Don't follow me, I'm lost

Don't laugh, your daughter may

Don't miss today worrying about

Don't Start With Me. You

Don't wash this vehicle -

Dyslexics Untie!

EARTH FIRST! We'll stripmine the

Eat Right, Exercise, Die Anyway

Empty the prisons - Make

Ever seen an UZI fired

Ever stop to think, and

Every time I find the

Everyone has a photographic memory.

Fight crime - Shoot back

First Hilary, then Jennifer -

Forget about World Peace.....Visualize Using

Forget the Flag. Burn a

Friends don't let Friends drive

Friends help you move. Real

Give me ambiguity or give

Give me coffee and no

God created Whiskey to keep

GROW YOUR OWN DOPE, PLANT

Hang up and drive.

Hard work has a future

He Who Hesitates Is Not

He who laughs last thinks

Help wanted-telepath: you know where

Help! I Farted and can't

He's not dead, he's electroencephalographically

Hire the Handicapped...Were fun to

Honk all you want, I'm

Honk If Anything Falls Off

Honk if you are just

Honk if you love me

Honk if you love peace

Honk If You Want To

Honk if you're horny

Horn broken - watch for

Humpty Dumpty didn't fall...he was

I am not unemployed I

I brake for no apparent

I can hold my own.

I didn't fight my way

I Do Whatever My Rice

I don't have a license

I feel like I'm diagonally

I gave up drinking, smoking

I get enough exercise just

I got this motor home

I Have The Body Of

I Haven't Lost My Mind,

I is a college student

I just got lost in

I killed a #NAME? just

I like you, but I

I lost my virginity, but

I love cats...they taste just

I love my country. It's

I need someone really bad...Are

I Refuse To Have A

I said no to drugs,

I souport publik edekasion

I still miss my wife,

I SWERVE to HIT People

I think therefore we have

I took an IQ test

I used to have a

I want to die in

I wonder how much deeper

I.R.S.: We've got what it

If at first you do

If everything seems to be

If the music's too loud

If Walking Is So Good

If we are what we

If we aren't supposed to

If We Quit Voting Will

If you always take time

If you can read this

If you can read this,

If you can read this,

If You Can Read This,

If You Can Read This,

If you think education is

If you're rich, I'm single

I'm already visualizing the duct

I'm just driving this way

I'm out of bed and

I'm shy, but I have

Is reading in the bathroom

It's Been Lovely But I

It's lonely at the top,

Jack Kevorkian for White House

Jesus is coming, everyone look

Jesus loves you... everyone else

Keep honking, I'm reloading

Kill 'em all. Let God

Laugh alone and the world

Lead me not into temptation,

Life is a sexually transmitted

Lord save me from your

Lottery: A tax on people

Love thy neighbor, but don't

Madness takes its toll. Please

Make it idiot proof and

Make the world a better

Metaphors be with you

Money Isn't Everything, But It

Montana -- At least our

My Hockey Mom Can Beat

My karma ran over my

My kid had sex with

My other car is a

My reality check bounced

My wife keeps complaining I

My Wife's other car is

Never get into an argument

Never underestimate the power of

Nice guys finish last and

Nothing is foolproof to a

Nothing political is correct.

Nothing to lose (on an

Of all the things I've

Oh sure. But what's the

On the other hand, you

Out of my mind. Back

Procrastinators Unite!... Tomorrow

Protected by . Magnum days

Puritanism: the haunting fear that

Reality is a crutch for

Remember Folks: Stop Lights Timed

Save the Dolphins. What did

Save the whales! Trade them

Save the whales. Collect the

Save Your Breath ... You'll

Seen it all, done it

Sex on television can't hurt

She's always late. Her ancestors

Smile, it's the second best

So you're a feminist...Isn't that

Some mornings, it's just not

Some people are only alive

Sometimes I wake up grumpy.

Stop repeat offenders. Don't re-elect

STUPIDITY should be Painful

Subvert the Dominant Paradigm

Sure you can trust the

Talk is Cheap - until

Taxation WITH representation isn't so

The Earth Is Full -

The Face Is Familiar But

The first boat people were

The gene pool could use

The more you complain, the

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